When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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