Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
