I am in a vortex of obligation.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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