Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
COCAINE IS GR8
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize
