Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
