My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
