I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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