i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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