when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Randomize
