Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
