PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
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