scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
This house was built for laser tag.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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