Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
