So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
