You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
