even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
