I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
