stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
May the power of my ass compel you!!
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
