i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize