Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
