If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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