Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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