oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
