Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
