Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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