Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
