that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
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