Screwed.edu
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He did a backflip because drugs
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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