Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
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