i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
