Do vagina's smell?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
