He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
