Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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