so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
