found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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