think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
