Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
