Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
