My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
