physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
