I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
