If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize