You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
