just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
