they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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