i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
