Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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