Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
