I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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