My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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